Tuesday, February 17, 2009

But I did it anyway

I was not going to post tonight, but I am.
I was not going to go to the gym tonight, but I did.
I was not going to go weigh in tonight, but I did.
I was feeling gross and I had to work a little late tonight so I was going to just come home and veg out and get some much needed sleep. Instead I pushed myself and I went to weigh in which was a huge but expected disappointment. I will not disclose just how much I gained, but suffice it to say that it took me weeks to get that much off and I gained it all back in 2 short weeks. It's amazing how badly we want to hold onto our fat.
(I once bought a magnet for someone that reads as follows: The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.)
Anyway I decided after that weigh in that I have no choice but to go to the gym and I ran 3 miles in 32 minutes and I am glad I did.
And then I wasn't going to post because I really, really have nothing to say except I ate too much and I shouldn't have and now I am annoyed. Y'all are going to be all nice and say things like "just keep trying, it's only a small setback" and the like. What you may really be thinking is, "if she eats like a pig, she deserves to look like one" or "I can only help those who help themselves". I know that's what I would be thinking about me. (I still would rather hear the earlier in your comments, rather than the latter or no more shout outs for you)
Here is how I am feeling: tired and weak and frustrated. I resolve to take those negative energies and thoughts and get rid of them. I have had my fun the past two weeks, basically eating whatever I want. Now is the time to get serious again, count points, have willpower, overcome the temptations!!
Please, God, give me strength.

5 comments:

Zehava said...

Ok Sarah this one is for you:

Take this pitfall as a lesson. Use it as fuel for the future. Take these negative feelings you are feeling now and use them to counteract whatever positives you think you might get from eating the wrong things in the future....

Another really good motivation: Buy smaller clothes!

I'm really proud of you that instead of just giving up you went to the gym and tried to do something positive! Here's to a week of positivity!

Luv Ya.

M said...

We need to fall in order to rise.

SaraK said...

That is awesome that you went to the gym anyway; absolutely a step in the right direction. You know you can do it!

Zehava said...

To piggyback on what Marg said and to prove my Bais Yaakov street cred: "bimkom she baalei Teshuva omdim ain tzadikim gemurim omdim." hehe. They tell you that after they catch you not wearing socks. :)

She-nerd said...

everyone really said it all already. hang in there. this week will pass. and i think it wasn't all fat that you gained in the last 2 weeks. it will come back off, and soon, and you will be happy again :)